A Well That Does Not Run Dry

One minute I’m at home cleaning out the guinea pig cage, and throwing dinner together for the kids, and the next I’m in the Artesian Bar in the Langham Hotel, wondering if the woman sitting down at the next table is in fact Amy Winehouse. It is. I bet she doesn’t clean out her own guinea pig cage.

I love living in London.

I’d gone to an art history lecture on Rubens with Edith. Rubens, admittedly, is not one of my favorite old masters, but the lecture was at my daughter’s school, given by her art teacher, and so I thought it might be interesting. It was.

He spoke about two paintings, both landscapes with rainbows which hung at one point on opposite walls in Rubens home in Het Steen. Bucolic landscapes, allegorical, with themes borrowed from classical antiquity and narrative referring to the power of religion. 

And I thought it was just some cows sitting by the water with some peasants walking by. Who knew!? There is a lesson somewhere in here about the need to look more closely at things, in seeking truth or something profound like that I’m sure.

Walking into the Artesian with Edith did not exactly require close inspection to reveal any latent truths. I gazed in awe, mouth probably agape, at the gorgeous wood chandeliers, and the Chinoiserie décor of the bar. There was something of an old Hollywood glamour to the place, and I felt right at home.

We were given a table in the corner, a great vantage point from which to see the rest of the place. Our Bellinis arrived in leggy glasses with cut crystal stems. Made with Prosecco NV, Cipriano, Crème de Peche and Pomthier peach puree, they were lovely, if not a bit heavy on the crème/puree. Not exactly a smoothie, but a close approximation. No matter, through the haze they were delicately fizzy and flavorful. But at £16 a punch, the second most expensive Bellini on the trail so far, I’m not sure they were worth it. Ouch!

The Artesian specializes in rum, and rum cocktails - Do I hear a mojito calling me next time? With their hefty price tags though, I may have to wait for an invitation. Anyway, I do think the drinks menu is the most lively and well-written I’ve seen in London so far. Can I say that? I realize I haven’t seen quite enough, but I just loved the format, names and descriptions.

You can order drinks with names like a Mad Hatter Martini, Devil in Red, Tiny 10 Club, or Coco Chavez. Or, you can opt for the Artesian Experience, or a Tour of the Caribbean, with their Cocktail Grazing sampling menu. In a nod to the Bellini, you can even order a P’tini, a combination of Wyborowa Exquisite vodka, passionfruit, peach purée, Crème de Peche and Peychaud’s bitters!

If you are not sure about your rums, the menu provides a description regarding the differences between light and dark, and if you fancy a non-alcoholic beverage, you can do like what I think Ms. Winehouse did, and order something like a Berry Folly, made of fresh squeezed pomegranate juice, raspberries, lime and agave nectar, ‘one for the brain cells, if you need a boost.’

If warmth is what you need, perhaps an Artesian Hot Buttered Rum would do the trick? More hunger inducing than thirst quenching I’ll admit, it is described as, ‘A buttery, relaxing drink served with Myer’s, clove-infused apricot brandy, hot water and a spoonful of homemade honey cream.’

I may just settle for a recession-proof bottle of Artesian water next time- with a twist of dandelion or burdock cordial. At £4.50, it is just a drop in the bucket (or well) by comparison.